Practice as the key for releasing ourselves from Perfection Prison.
In the last newsletter I wrote about Practice as the key for releasing ourselves from Perfection Prison. Then, just because it’s the season and Gratitude is on all of our minds, I offered that Gratitude is a quality we can practice all the time – especially when things are tough and we’re feeling down.
It is Thanksgiving week which means many of us will have many opportunities to practice – patience, curiosity, perhaps self-care, etc. Maybe you want to Practice making a specific dish? Or, maybe you want to Practice being more sociable? If you want to Practice deep listening, Thanksgiving and other social gatherings can be a great opportunity.
The other night, I found myself looking for recipe inspiration at food52 and came across this story (with delicious looking recipe) My Mother & I Don’t Talk. But on Thanksgiving, We Make Russian Pie Together. Scroll down for a link to this story which took my breath away.
Yes, the relationships with our family can be challenging and even painful at times. I love my family. At the same time there have been struggles and conflict that I’ve written about (in particular with my immigrant father) and I know I’m not alone. Some common challenges that many of my clients come to me to work through include:
- Feeling judged by our loved ones who have a vision of ourselves that is different from our own;
- Frustration about not feeling seen and accepted as we are;
- Feeling like we’re not ________ enough;
- Working through generational trauma;
- Etcetera, etcetera.
It can take time to understand that these are perceptions and we can choose to accept them or not. I’m not saying it’s easy, and this is where we can Practice. When we feel triggered and find ourselves withdrawing, or shouting, or our heart racing, some qualities we can practice include: resilience, compassion, patience, curiosity, forgiveness, etc. Take a deep breath and make a choice of how you want to respond, instead of reacting.
Whether you’re spending Thanksgiving week with blood family, chosen family, at a Friendsgiving, or even on your own. This can be a great opportunity to practice and connect– with others and yourself.
With You In Gratitude,